Financial anxiety is something that affects many people irrespective of how much money they actually have. 

In my blog post How To Take Control Of Your Money To Eradicate Financial Anxiety, I discussed how you would know if you were suffering financial anxiety along with some practical tips to allow you to start regaining financial control. In this post we are going to dig deeper and discuss your relationship with money.  It’s important that you identify why you have arrived at the point of financial anxiety. Isolating the issues is the first step to prescribing the solutions to improve your financial health. 

As with any relationshipif you don’t manage it correctly, your affiliation with money can cause enormous stress and worry.  However, unlike most other relationshipsyour control and influence over money is entirely in your hands.   

Poor relationships and management of money develop over time, and even the financially comfortable can become victims of anxious thoughts.  These anxious thoughts and fears often become ingrained into our unconscious mind during some of our childhood experiences.  

These fears can then begin to manifest themselves as beliefs that we convince ourselves to be true.  We then unconsciously develop a ‘set of rules’ based on these theories, and this ultimately forms our financial habits, even when nothing has occurred to prove their validity. 

One way to heal your relationship with money, and therefore reduce your financial anxiety, is first to identify the rules we have created for ourselves.  Once we have done this, we can begin to deconstruct them through methods such as journaling and mindful meditation.   

These practices will set you on a powerful path of self- discovery; they will encourage you to challenge your financial beliefs, so you are empowered to tackle them.  You can then begin to re-write your financial rules, to set yourselves free and regain control. 

Search deep inside so you can begin to nurture your financial health. 

Let me introduce you to Emily.  Emily is one of my clients. Her parents divorced when she was eight years old.  Throughout her childhood, both parents showered her with gifts.   

When we began unpicking Emma’s relationship with money, she realised that she was spending money she didn’t have on gifts for loved ones. The money belief she held was that you needed to buy people things to prove your love for them.   

My guidance to Emma was simple and encapsulated in this one-line synopsis. Emily concluded that she should show love for family by spending quality time with them. 

Of course, we all have our own different relationships with money and our own life experiences. As a consequence, there can never be a “one solution fits” approach or quick fixes.  Our subconscious money stories will continue to impact our financial decisions until we identify the influence of the story and we examine the behaviours this is creating in our spending patterns.   

We all have ‘money stories’; rules that govern how we manage our finances. 


If you begin to take the time to re-write your money story, you will quickly experience some changes that will help to ease and alleviate your financial anxiety.  Take a few minutes each day to write down your thoughts. Review your written notes at the end of the week and use them to form the basis of a plan.  This approach will slowly develop into a more robust financial strategy. 

If you would like to journal about your money story, then you can find my Rewrite Your Money Story Journal on  and .

To help further alleviate some of your negativity and fear, you might also consider therapies such as Hypnosis or EFT, (Emotional Freedom Technique) both of which have been found useful in removing negative beliefs around money. 

If you are suffering from severe financial hardship or having challenges in managing your debt, then you should contact organisations such as or 


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